Washington, D.C. — According to an unnamed source at the White House, President Donald J. Trump has asked for the construction of a McDonald’s outlet inside the West Wing. It appears that Mr. Trump has been dissatisfied with the Secret Service’s delivery time from the McDonald’s closest to the White House — approximately a five-minute walk. Instead, according to the same unnamed source, Mr. Trump wants to see the Golden Arches from the Oval Office and be close enough to “smell the fries.”
It is no secret that the President is fond of fast food. During the campaign, Mr. Trump was photographed with buckets of fried chicken on his private jet, a taco bowl from the grill in Trump Tower, and an obscene amount of pizza. Mr. Trump is also known for having his steaks charred and served with an ungodly amount of ketchup.
It is rumored that White House Chief of Staff, General John Kelly, will be operating the grill during the lunch hour rush.